Thursday, May 17, 2007


Golden Boy, originally uploaded by savemejebus.

Papa Smurf and I are taking a couple of days to be away from each other. He needed to have work done on his rear end. For the next two days I'm being escorted around town by a sporty Mazda 3 that I have taken to calling Golden Boy. I wish I can say that I'm miserable without Papa Smurf, that I miss him terribly. Instead I'm embarrassed to say that I don't miss him at all.

Golden Boy and I hit it off immediately. There was little to none of the early awkwardness that comes with being with someone for the first time. I got on him and rode as if we've been together for a long time. Golden Boy is easy to handle, smooth at turns and responsive to my demands, whereas Papa Smurf was becoming a little more tempermental and slower to react. There is an age difference. Golden Boy only has 3,000 miles on him while Papa Smurf is nearing 75,000. Papa is no longer the shiny, good looking car I fell in love with. He has had to endure a lot of things and has the dents and scratches to prove it. While Golden Boy already has some scars, they are the scars of youth, of someone who may have been a tad too reckless. They are not boring scars.

I won't even go into Papa Smurf's junk in the trunk. It was a treat to be able to put something in Golden Boy's trunk without having to push around a bunch of junk. Papa Smurf just has too much baggage, too much history, whereas Golden Boy feels like a new start, the thrill of the unknown.

I'm guilt-ridden. I feel like I'm being unfaithful to Papa Smurf after all that we've been through. It has even crossed my mind how great it would be to be with someone new. But I'm not someone to give up so easily on something I've invested a lot of time and money. I'll see things through with Papa Smurf for however long we can make it work, but I have doubts that he's the one. I just know we'll outgrow each other and we'll both move on. I can overcome this temptation with Golden Boy and I'm sure I won't miss him when Papa Smurf returns, but I'll always appreciate him for reminding me how it used to be--and perhaps can be again. I'm not giving up on Papa Smurf just yet.

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